I started smoking in high school around 17 years old. My friends and I would cut class and go behind the public library next to smoke bowls. I smoked pretty much all the time from 17 until I was 21. I quit because I had become depressed and I found the weed made it worse.I returned to it in my early 30’s after I had settled into a much more mentally demanding job (technology). Weed really took my mind off the mentally demanding and stressful nature of that job. It was amazing how quickly my stress would evaporate between puffs on the bowl as I stared into the distance and forgot what I was just thinking about.
Once in a while, there were the few times I would be “on call” and be completely high and then a call would come in. There’s nothing like trying to figure out what is going on with a server while all you can think about and notice is how soothing the blue and silver Windows color scheme is. I would struggle to type in passwords sometimes.
But mostly, I enjoy it. I enjoy how pleasurable it makes the small things in life. Driving, cooking, cleaning all become exciting adventures. It’s as if this is the first time I am vacuuming the rug. I strategize how I’m going to clean the rug. I decide on a series of criss cross patterns that ensures I am getting the same areas of the rug multiple times from different angles. Once done, I admire how clean the rug is and how crisp and striking the lines are from the vacuum. If I was sober doing this I would probably hurry through the task, thinking about all the other things I need to get done, perhaps feeling anxious and hurried.
Of course, it goes without saying I enjoy it for the stereotypical things all marijuana smokers supposedly do. Movies, music, sex all are enhanced while I am high.
I can over do it. I usually don’t smoke until the evening but there are days when I start early and then I am pretty much done for the day. Perhaps taking a nap that afternoon or falling asleep in front of the TV at 7pm. Not good. I’m in my 40’s not my 80’s.
But mostly I do it at night a few hours before I am going to sleep. It’s a great way to relax and stop thinking about work or life for a few hours before I go to sleep. I don’t drink alcohol. I find marijuana so much better.
It’s disappointing that the US government still sees it as a Schedule 1 drug and outlaws it completely. When I am done with my career, if marijuana is still not at least available medically or recreationally I intend to get involved with changing that. I wouldn’t risk it now and potentially damage my reputation at work or risk some sort of LEO attention because of my political beliefs. It’s unfortunate to feel that way when you live in the United States, but there are many hypocrisies and contradictions about American life that don’t need to be detailed here.
Suffice to say, I feel it should be at least decriminalized. There is no sane reason why anyone in the US should be arrested and incarcerated for small time possession and recreational use of marijuana. It is such a disgrace that the US continues to employ draconian measures against legitimate medical users, dispensarys and recreational users of marijuana. At the very least, the “crime” doesn’t fit the punishment. I hope I will see this change in my lifetime.