It’s Coming Up On A Year Since I Had To Put Down My Dog

It’s Coming Up On A Year Since I Had To Put Down My Dog…

… and I really miss my “Big Guy.”

He was a big, beautiful German Sheppard and St. Bernard mix. He was huge, he weighed 90 lbs but was sweet, gentle and shy. He would come up to me and place his head in my lap so I could scratch the back of his head and neck. He had large, beautiful expressive ears that reflected his emotions. When he was curious, they strained forward, when happy they were way up on his head, when sad or scared well back on his head.

He was scared of thunderstorms and fireworks and would squeeze himself underneath where ever I was sitting so he could be close to me when he was frightened. I would take my shoes off and pet him with my feet to sooth him.

He would wake me up in the morning by “talking” to me. He would come over and nudge me awake. I would ask him how he was this morning and he would respond with a weird grunting/yawning sound, sort of like Chewbacca.

How you doing this morning Harley?
Arrrrrrrgggggmmmmmmmm
Really, you don’t say?
Errrmmmmmoooogggggghhhh
And then what happened?
Mmmmrrrgggghhhhhh
Oh Harley-Barley you so crazy!

About a year before I had to put him down, he started having problems walking. He would struggle to get up, and jump into the car. It got bad fast. Within a year, he could no longer go up or down the stairs without slipping and falling down the stairs. I had to carry him up and down the stairs. Then he would slip and fall and couldn’t get himself up. We had to pick him up constantly and get him upright. Then he lost control of his bowels. Finally, he couldn’t stand up anymore even when we would pick him up. He just couldn’t hold himself up anymore.

I never had to put one of my dogs down before. I was so stressed, sad and upset. The vet was kind and understanding. I held him until he took his last breath. I have his ashes in a box in my living room. We have pictures of him so I can think of him often.

I loved my Big Guy and miss him terribly. I will never forget him.

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